We Can Do Better

This morning I engaged in a discussion on FB about working moms vs. stay-at-home moms and the effects on children. This is such a loaded topic with many layers and variables. What hit me the strongest was the way we, as women, criticize,  minimize, compete with, and judge each other. Once a family is in trouble, it is a hey day for the forces of discouragement, isolation, anger, and hurt.

Girlfriends, we can and must do better. We have to stand WITH and FOR each other. There is a place and time set aside for you to get quiet, breathe, rest, and talk about the topics on your heart - to get some clarity about the things that are feeling a little fuzzy.

The EXHALE Retreat is for you if:   
 *  You would like to gain insight into the restlessness you are feeling
*  You are living with negative emotions such as Depression, Fear, Anxiety, Stress, etc.
*  You are experiencing challenges and heart break in your relationships
*  Your past is showing up in your present in challenging ways
*  You feel as if you don’t really know yourself anymore 
*  You would like to deepen your spirituality and your relationship with God

Join us September 26-29 for a private lake retreat in Cassopolis, MI
http://www.exhaleretreat.org

EXHALE ...

God's breath creates, gives life and fills us up

This retreat is done in the spirit of biblical principles.  It is important to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and to have a desire to grow your faith.  If you would like to know more about His deep love for you, go to www.needhim.org

Th

Be Still

I was hiking in the McDowell mountains with my friend Jan and the concept and challenge of achieving stillness occupied much of our trek. I remembered a time several years ago when a huge disappointment in my life compelled me to stop, be still, observe, and listen. I would have told you that I WAS still, because I am a quiet person and I confused the two. My heart and spirit within me were restless and fluttering. Stillness evaded me and the more I tried to find it, the more elusive it became. That is the thing about stillness; striving and struggling to find it push it further out of reach. You have to acknowledge the desire for it, set aside the time to get quiet and listen, then just let it happen. It requires a letting go, an attitude shift, and absolutely no expectations about how it will show up or the way it will manifest in your life.

Think for a moment of the calm and stillness before a storm, before the first rumbles of thunder and the first crack of lightning. Consider a wheel turning at high speeds. When you look at the center where it is anchored to the axle, there is no movement at all. When life moves at a furious pace are you able to remain anchored? Can you find your center and be still? Can your children find safe mooring with a mom who is firmly anchored?

            "Life from the Center is a life of unhurried peace and power.

              It is simple. It is serene. It is amazing. It is triumphant. It is

              radiant. It takes no time, but occupies all our time. And it

              makes all our life programs new and overcoming."

- Thomas Kelly -

Life is moving at mach speed. I know you have many demands on your time and energy. I know that sometimes obligation and schedules are at odds with values and priorities. In these next few weeks, in the midst of all the activity, commit to step into your beauty and power and allow stillness to settle into you. Let your heart rest. I read Captivating years after I learned to be still. These words resonate with me now as they did then.

"Beauty invites. Beauty nourishes. Beauty comforts. Beauty inspires. Beauty is transcendent. Beauty is core to a woman - who she is and what she longs to be. Beauty indwells every woman and flows from a heart at rest. When we allow our defenses to come down beauty emerges as if from behind a veil. When we choose to set aside our normal means of survival and just let our heart show up, beauty comes with it. Beauty comes from the inner part of us. Our hearts. A heart at rest. Not a heart that is striving and restless. 

A woman in her glory, a woman of beauty, is a woman who is not striving to become beautiful or worthy or enough. She knows in her quiet center that God finds her beautiful, that she is worthy, and she is enough. In fact, the only thing getting in the way of our being fully captivating and enjoyed is our striving. A woman of true beauty offers others the grace to be and the room to become.

A woman whose heart is at rest invites others to rest. We are invited to be ourselves. You  find room for your soul. It expands. You can breathe again. You can rest. It is good. You are free to be you. It is one of life's greatest gifts."

                                                From Captivating  by John and Stasi Eldredge

Come get still, rest, find your center. Recapture your beauty.  September 26-29.

www.exhaleretreat.org

Why in the World Did I Do That?

Have you ever reacted to a situation in a way that surprised or embarrassed you? Have you stood looking in the mirror at the end of the day while you brushed your teeth and wondered how in the world this day went to the places it did? Have you been in an interaction with someone else who responded with completely inappropriate, over the top, words and behaviors? Have you ever stopped to wonder why these things happen?

When we are wounded, abused, treated unjustly, or have trauma, our minds and bodies respond by creating a piece that holds those strong, negative emotions for us. This can happen from our earliest days; in fact, most of those strong responses were created by childhood issues that we didn’t have the emotional, psychological, or spiritual ability to cope with. As we grow older we certainly learn to cope in more appropriate and healthy ways – but sometimes an old, STRONG emotion comes up and we are triggered to react exactly the way we first responded. Hence, the immaturity and overreaction of  childhood.

I am a therapist and life coach. I have studied and used all the modern psychological methods to heal these wounds – and many of them have some good effects. NONE actually heal. Only God can heal. Only the truth of God can break the lies we have come to believe about ourselves and the world around us. When we ask Christ to speak into the situation and take the emotion that is an obstacle to us, He comes and grants our request.

The EXHALE retreat www.exhaleretreat.org has this inner work as a core tenet. We will show you how to heal trauma and old wounds and will walk you through a personal experience of healing with God.

If you would like to break the spirit of fear, anger, humiliation, unworthiness, or any others that are keeping you from the life you are meant to be living – join us Sept. 26-29 on a journey of healing, restoration, and excitement. Laus Deo!

Road Trip!

I am on a road trip from Phoenix to Indiana with Lanette- she is one of the great blessings and highlights of my life. When you experience something way out of your ordinary routine, you can be sure there is a wonderful rush of insight and revelation in store!

I am reading Right People  Right Place  Right Plan by Jentezen Franklin. Being in the right place is crucial to being the right person and meeting the right people, so you can fulfill the right plan for your life. Here's what grabbed me yesterday..."a geographical change has spiritual promotion in it". What do you make of that? I have moved quite often and have found it to be true - when I was open and watching. That's the trick isn't it? Having your mind and heart in the right place; meaning centered and available to the right people and plan - in an attitude of anticipation and appreciation.

As I write this I know my story is shifting and expanding into new territory. I am committed to being watchful, open, useable. I will keep you posted as I learn. Remember when I wrote about my friend Noel Barto and her beautiful, creative expression of story? If you missed it go back and read the post titled What's Your Story Today?

Here are a couple more of her queries. I am going to ponder and journal them. I encourage you to do the same - even if you are in the "same" geographical spot as you have been for a long time - especially then I think.

 - What am I running toward/from today?
 - Where do I belong today?

We are all sojourners, headed for somewhere. We are  meant to do life together. I am grateful to have you along! Let's make it a trip with purpose, power, and play in it.

Blessings,
Beth

Play to WIN!

Wow! Are you as stunned as I am that we are one week into the final quarter of 2012?!? If you are where you would like to be or have exceeded expectations this year - Congratulations! If you have not accomplished what you had hoped to, there's good news! You still have time to make significant progress. You can rally for a STRONG season with a BIG finish!

I want to help you do just that. I would be honored to help you:

P   You possess tremendous PERSONAL POWER. Are you using it? Come learn to tap into it.

L   LET GO of thoughts of LACK and LIMITATION. Move out of your comfort zone. I will
      support you as you expand your life.

A   Your ATTITUDE determines your altitude. AIM high. Do you know what you ASPIRE to?

Y   YOU - your original, amazing self - aligned with your values, no internal conflict, making
       wise decisions. Want it?


T   What are you TOLERATING?  Discover ways to get unstuck and live each day in JOY.

O   ORDINARY people can to EXTRAORDINARY things with powerful motivation and the
       tools to be successful. We will design a plan for an extraordinary future.


W   WHAT do you really, really WANT?  CLARIFY and CLAIM your passion and dreams.

 I    Do you feel you can trust your INTUITION? Adjust your brain to hear what your heart already
      knows. I will teach you how to LISTEN.

 N   NOW! START wherever you are. One of life's great joys is to BEGIN.

                             Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. 
                                   Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
                                                                                                 - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe -

There is a great lesson in my new book Called Into Motion: Lesson Plans for Life called Finish Strong, about distraction and procrastination getting in your way. Click on the link and get started!
Blessings,
Beth
602.626.8036       beth.madigan@cox.net

Half the Sky

Last night I watched the first part of Half the Sky on PBS. Click on the link to see the episode and read about the project and the remarkable people who put it together and the women whose stories they film.

As a life coach I am constantly amazed at the women I meet - their grace, courage, innate intelligence, perseverance, resilience, faith, and dignity. Half the Sky blew me away! I work with sexually abused and traumatized women. The sad truth is, if you are a female in this world, you are at risk. Tragically and unbelievably, the jeopardy commences at younger and younger ages. A two year old girl was rescued from a brothel in Cambodia. The blood covered clothes looked like they belonged to a doll as we witnessed the horror of them being swept out onto the street.

Lest you think these atrocities only occur in third world countries - think again. There are NO boundaries for this evil. NO lines of geography, race, economics, education, or belief system. I am in awe of the people who dedicate themselves and risk their lives to rescue and serve these girls and women. It is massively important and urgent work.

But, here's what MUST happen to stem the tide of abuse, trauma, exploitation, and murder. We MUST stop the pimps and johns and all who perpetrate this heinous industry. We MUST change societal beliefs that say this is acceptable behavior. We MUST enforce laws against these crimes. We MUST raise the value of human life - all life, but certainly the beauty and value of our precious girls.

If you are reading this thinking you can't really do anything to affect change...here are some things to think about. If you have a negative mindset about "whores" or "prostitutes" as sluts or sex addicts, change it. I used to think they chose that life style; that they wanted it. They don't. Most have been abused as children - far too  many ARE children. The average of entry into "the life" in the U. S. is 13. No girl chooses to be beaten, isolated, imprisoned, or service dozens of men a day. They are tricked, coerced, and broken into "the life".

I spoke to a mother whose 15 y.o. daughter was befriended by her pimp at a local mall. They know how to "groom" these girls to trust them as boyfriends. She was ultimately taken to Florida and calls home occasionally. She is 19 now with two children and such a deep trauma bond to her captor and such a terror of being discovered and beaten, that she won't tell her parents how to find her.

Strip clubs and pornography exploit women. Disengage. Pre-wedding and other parties with inappropriate sexual behavior have become socially acceptable. Rethink.Your sons, grandsons, nephews, students, and neighbor boys must be educated about how to treat girls. They are meant to be protectors and respecters of women. Make this subject acceptable and open dialogue. Only by bringing the dark to the light and ending the demand, will we cease having to rescue girls and women.
Laus Deo,
Beth

Look at Me Now!

Every now and again there is a bit of news that renews our faith, causes us to pump our fists, and begs a loud, "Yes! You GO girl!" Last week's story about demeaned and bullied Whitney Kropp is one of those bright spots in an otherwise dark news cycle.

Whitney was overjoyed to find she had been nominated for the Homecoming Court at her Michigan high school. Her joy turned to pain and humiliation when she realized it was all a malicious prank by some nasty bullies. Feeling like "trash" and convinced no one cared, including her own brother and sister, she decided to just quietly withdraw and fade out. Her sister encouraged her to take a stand, telling her she was strong and courageous and should go all the way with it. Yay for sisters, biological and chosen! A group of "sisters" left their own school game and drove an hour to honor Whitney and stand in solidarity with her. Yes!

Hairstylist Shannon Champagne offered to do her hair. She got a beautiful orange dress - her favorite color. As word got around town, people came out to support her - even purchasing orange t-shirts emblazoned with the words, "It's not cool to be cruel".  Don't you just LOVE this story?!? She was escorted by her dad and grandfather. Oh! This just gets better and better. Men who will stand in the gap as protectors, defenders, and cheerleaders! My heart is singing.

She now has over 100,000 FB fans and her mom said this has empowered many others to speak up and tell their own stories. Another resounding YES! "you were designed by God to live a life of purpose and power. Who you are and what you think matters. The opinions and feelings of others are not one whit more important than yours. Don't let your words get stuck between your brain and your lips where they keep pushing to come out."  Beth Madigan  Called Into Motion: Lesson Plans for Life

Whitney has this to say, "Don't let those bullies bring you down. Go with your heart and your gut. I did it and look at me now." Thanks for your courage and example Whitney!

Whoever you are... Whatever your circumstances - past or present...However you have been treated or spoken to...  You have an important story. Your voice NEEDS to be heard. You matter. You are unique in all the world.

Tell your story to someone safe. If you don't have a safe person, tell me. I would be honored to hear it. Get a copy of the book and work through STUCK and Don't Waste Your Suffering.
Blessings,
Beth